Did you know that 47% of Americans feel victimized into not paying income tax? Ace detective and presidential hopeful Mitt Romney did some digging to uncover that shocking revelation.

Here’s some ideas on what our boy can do to make up for all that lost tax revenue from those slackers!

The Elderly:
-Recipients of social security may only collect for 2 years. After that they may either rejoin the work force or be sit adrift on an ice float (ditched in the desert if global warming wins).
-Add an additional tax for every year made it past the average life expectancy.
-Make viewings of Jag and Walker Texas Ranger subscription only. Collect sales tax.
-Seniors with memory loss can pay taxes twice.
-Place able bodied elders in work camps. Sell products to China, Brazil, and India.

Families with Children
-Remove tax benefits for having children. Unless they’re Mormon.
-Give tax breaks to women who have abortions (but not legally, of course).
-Lower the working age to 6. That’s 10 more years of tax revenue to collect!
-Raise sales taxes on all Disney and Nickelodeon products.
-Taxes on tears.

The Working Poor
-Lower the cost of bullets and let the problem take care of itself.
-Place a toll booth on the boarder for questionable immigrant crossings.
-Tax Mexico. WE GOT ENOUGH OF THEM, AM I RIGHT?
-Outlaw Spam. Create a government sponsored black market. All profits go to funding wars overseas…oh yeah, and taxes.
-Levy a NASCAR tax.

Tax Credits
-GET RID OF EVERY SINGLE TAX CREDIT EVER (unless it’s to a GOP campaign or for corporations).

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